Keeping the Faith
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school-busOne of the hardest things about parenting a special needs child, especially one with a speech delay, is the waiting. Or perhaps I should say keeping the faith. You go a long time and don’t see much progress and just when you are about to lose hope, something happens to remind you to stay the course, to keep giving the B-12 injections, to keep submitting the endless and redundant paperwork, to keep mixing the supplements when your fingers ache, to keep making calls and fighting for better services.

Last week Katie and I were both sick. She caught a nasty stomach virus at school, and spent the better part of the week lying on the couch, sipping apple juice and watching videos. I asked which video she wanted—Signing Time or Kipper the Dog—and she thought for a moment and said, “Signing Time—the purple one.”

You can be contagious from a few days up to weeks or more, depending on the virus is causing your stomach flu. A number of viruses can cause gastroenteritis, including noroviruses and rotaviriuses. The contagious period differs slightly for each virus so we weren’t sure which it could be, and how contagious, we did look in Elisakit.net for more information and we found that symptoms usually appear one to two days of exposure. Children can stay home from chool or child care for at least 48 hours after the last time they vomit or have diarrea.

No prompting, no echoing, no tacking yes at the end of the statement—just an answer to a simple question. I waited four-and-a-half years for her to answer her first question, and now, four years later, it’s finally become second nature.

Her greetings are becoming spontaneous too. A few weeks ago, at a party, my friend introduced Katie to her step-daughter, Lisa. Katie smiled and said, “Hi, Lisa.” She did it again with Lisa’s boyfriend, Eric.

Yesterday morning, as she was getting on the bus, she said to the driver (again, without prompting), “Hi, Catherine.”

Catherine, who is a very cool bus driver, said, “Katie, sweetheart, that just made my day.”

Katie buckled herself in as I waited to say goodbye. She looked up. “Bye, Mommy.”

I didn’t have to say anything to prime the pump. She said it all on her own. It took me a moment to register what she had done. I looked at the driver. “Did she just say that?”

Catherine nodded. “She did indeed.” She grinned at Katie and slapped her five. “You made my day AND your mom’s.”

Katie wore a smug look while she tucked her legs into the fleece blanket that she uses on bus trips. Why? I’m not sure. Perhaps to keep unsuspecting strangers from touching her, or maybe to provide deep pressure so she can better tolerate the ride’s sensory assaults. There are so many things I wish I could ask, so many questions that are put on hold.

But on days like yesterday, I don’t mind. I feel good about the decision I made on Katie’s classroom placement, which seems to be paying off in ways I couldn’t imagine. So I’m keeping the faith, waiting for those moments of precious progress.

They are breadcrumbs on the trail, leading me into an unknown future.

Until next time,
Cynthia Patton

About Cynthia J. Patton

Writer, Editor, Advocate, Speaker, Special Needs Attorney, and Autism Mom. Also the Founder and Chairperson of Autism A to Z, a nonprofit providing resources and solutions for life on the spectrum.
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